Information Central

[Elyssa Schmidt]

July 12th

I can't believe that it's only four days until I leave for camp. Thank God! I don't think that I can handle more than four more days here in this palacial monstrosity. I just can't take it anymore!!! One more day, and I won't be held accountable for my actions.

Since my first summer back 'home', my home life has been far from perfect. And before now, before my family sunk to a whole new level of intolerance, it never really bothered me. But now? Now, when your own father threatens to kill you if you ever bring up magic in his household again. EVER. When you are locked in your room, while your wand is locked somewhere in this palace. When you are watched like a newly captured fugitive because your family is so concerned about what everyone thinks, about what would happen to them if their friends found out that their eldest daughter was a witch. Not what would happen to their daughter, but what would happen to their social standing. When your family talks about the magical community as though absolutely everyone is a Revolutionary, ready to enact violence on Muggles at any time. Life isn't pleasant. I'm just glad that they are letting me go to camp.

I can't wait to get back to North Carolina and my home there. I can't wait to see all of my friends. I just can't wait to get back to a place where the people at least are tolerant of you, even if they aren't especially fond of you. ANYTHING is better than staying here. And I do mean anything.

Camp has always sounded fun. And now I finally get to go. I know that Alex and Abby are going to be there, so I know it won't be dull. And I think that some of my Delphin friends are coming as well. At least, I hope they are. I think Laura and Avery are coming, but I'm not really sure. It's been so long since I got a letter. My parents have been intercepting my owls. I know that they have. I haven't gotten a letter since...June 15th. When Laura wrote to tell me that her family was going to England to visit her grandparents. That was the last contact I had with the outside world.

The only reason that I haven't snapped yet, is because of my cat, Henry. At least they didn't take that away too. If they had, all hell would have broken loose in this house, and I would be long gone. I don't know where I would have gone, but I would be far away from here and everything that my family stands for. Once I graduate, I'm never coming back here again. Plain and simple. NEVER. Maybe then they can just pretend that they never had a daughter named Elyssa. Then, they can be happy. And without them, I'll be happy, too. It's a win-win situation.

Four more days. That's my new mantra. Four more days, and then I'm free of them. Just four more days. I hope that I can survive.

[Elyssa Schmidt]

August 2006

My father is dead.

Why is it so hard for me to say that? My father and I haven't been close since I was two, when Maggie and Ruth were born. That was the last time that my father actually liked me. And now, he's gone.

I don't know why I mind so much. We fought all the time. He thought that my being magical was the worst thing in the world. My mother agreed. That's why she didn't send me an invitation to his memorial service. Sure, she said in her letter that it was because she didn't want me to miss school, but I know why. She didn't want the freak of the family on display. The child who was sent to a special school. The one who was only ever home for three months during the summer. I wasn't welcome there.

My father is dead, and I didn't even get to go to his funeral.

He was murdered. He was shot and killed in a Publix parking lot, a car jacking. He was shot and left to die buying a gallon of milk and some eggs. The whole thing just makes me sick. My mother blames me for it. I could tell by the way she worded her letter. She blames me for something that could have happened to anyone. But, because I am a witch, someone shot and killed my father. Apparently, my mother thinks I am evil.

I wish that this didn't bother me so much. Why should I care so much about someone who made me feel worthless and unworthy of love? Why should I care about someone who repeatedly threatened to kill me if I ever revealed my 'little secret' to anyone he knew? Why should I care so much about someone who didn't care about me?

My father is dead. and I shouldn't care. But I do.