Diamond loses Kevin the Robot

[rocco]

Diamond, remember when you couldn't pay for all of Kevin the Robot's oil changes? Remember when you got used fryer oil from McDonalds and put it in Kevin? Remember when Kevin got violently sick from the shitty McDonalds fryer oil? Remember how mad Kevin got that you had used fryer oil and went berserk? Remember how he broke out in an acne like rash and began shitting fryer oil all over the house? Remember how mad Mrs. Powers was that Kevin dumped smelly oil all over the house. Remember when Mrs. Powers called 1800-GOT-JUNK and told them to come get Kevin? Remember how they got there and loaded Kevin into their truck and drove away with him? Remember how he escaped by killing the driver? Remember how he rolled back to your house and found you home from school and jerking off to Slaters wrestling pic? Remember how Kevin came at you with his metal claws, ripped off your Zubaz and plugged your ass? Remember when he drained all his shitty fryer oil into your brownpipe? Remember when he then fired you threw the window and out into the back yard where Hound Dog shit on your head? Remember how your farts smelled like shit and french fries for weeks? Remember how you filled Kevin with new oil but the cops came and arrested Kevin for murdering the 1800-GOT-JUNK guy? Remember how the cops took Kevin away and had him dismantled? Remember how you cried because you had lost your best friend? Remember how Mrs. Powers heard your cries and instead of consoling you fingered herself then farted in your face? You sure learned about being a cheapskate that time!

ROCCO

[Kurt Steinberg]

Great recap! I love it how Diamond's best friend in the world viciously ass-raped him and pumped him full of fryer oil. I wonder who reassembled Kevin? Was it Maxwell Nerdstrom?

[rocco]

I imagine it was Nerdstrom, but I also wonder about that Ollie Creakly. He seemed like a shifty character, and he may have been somehow related to Mylo!


ROCCO