Pause

[Dragon]

His lovers fingertips upon his skin brought a small groan from his lips, and closing his eyes he relaxed into the soothing touch. Grey didnt need to say anything, he was giving Dragon comfort without doing so, and thats all that Dragon wanted right then. He didnt want to talk or discuss how he was feeling, he just wanted silent understanding and support. He had to suffer through it every day, but it only usually got this bad around the anniversary. He'd tried to hard to stop himself from caving and giving into his dark inhibitions, but eventually he had done, and thats what had brought him to this moment. Thankfully there was no heated words now, just a simple comment from his lover which lifted some form of weight off his mind.

For a while he lay there letting the feeling of the Lycans fingertips upon his sensative skin sooth him, but no matter how much he tried he couldnt find the sleep which he needed. "You know, its still so hard, and yet everything is so much better than a few centuries ago..." he started, opening his eyes, though it didnt effect his lack of vision. "When it first happened i couldnt imagine myself living at all, i had nothing, i dont know how i made it this far..."

[Grey]

The wolf had almost let himself drift off, his fingers pausing occasionally before he caught himself and resumed the near-automatic movement. It was Dragon's speech in the silent darkness that drew him out of the haze that threatened to overtake him. Pulling his eyes open, and having no recollection of when he had closed them, he turned his head slightly, despite knowing Dragon couldn't see him or meet his gaze. "It's because you were a strong person. You still are. I know I can't tell you how to deal with this, because ultimately, while I understand pain and hurt and emotional suffering, I can't understand exactly what you feel. I haven't lived through it." His words were quiet and meant to be reassuring without being at all judgmental or patronizing.

He knew well how much Dragon had cared for his wife and child. Perhaps that should have been strange to him, that the vampire could shift so dramatically in his affections, but it wasn't, and it didn't bother Grey in the slightest. He wasn't so much a replacement; he had no doubt the other man loved him, but it wasn't completely the same. He couldn't even begin to put it all into words, and he was grateful that he'd never had to. He could be content enough with what they had not to have to explain it or put it into a category. Grey tried hard not to think about the fact that somewhere down the road, his own death would be causing Dragon this kind of pain.

[Dragon]

"Honestly i wish i hadnt lived through it either..." he replied softly, finding some comfort in his lovers words. He knew Grey wasnt even trying to understand the pain he was going through, no one could. He couldnt name one person who had their family taken from them in such a way, and as for Akina, well there was one person at all who's had their child killed before them numerous times. It still hurt him to think that he'd given up, but he couldnt bare the thought of loosing her again. It hadnt been destined that she live, and though he was barely accepting of that he had come to terms with the fact that having her live was not an option, and now no longer a possibility. He'd made sure of that the last time she'd been taken so that he could no longer put her through any suffering.

For a few more moments he was silent, contemplating what he was thinking, but no matter how much he tried nothing seemed to make anything feel better right then. "I'm sorry for letting it get to me like this, i just seem to head for something to try and stop the pain. Nothing works though, you think i'd realise after so many years that there is no getting rid of it..." he continued, opening his eyes to glance up to his lover, wishing that he could see the other.

[Grey]

"Even with all those superpowers, you're still only human," the lycan said with a tired chuckle. In his mind, the other man had nothing to apologize for. He should have realized what significance the date had, even if Dragon hadn't ever told him as much. And it really was his own fault for providing the bottles of alcohol that now sat empty in the rubbish bin. If he put himself in the vampire's place, he didn't imagine he'd be much better off. With a twinge, the wolf suddenly realized how close he'd come to being in a very similar position. Had another miraculous escape not happened, he'd be mourning the death of his best friend; could he really say that he wouldn't have been tempted by a substance that promised to take away his pain? It would have been so much easier for him being far closer to mortal than a vampire was.

That hadn't happened, though, and the brunette refused to allow himself to dwell on the 'what ifs'. Brooding had never been a good look for him, and he avoided it whenever possible. Letting out a soft breath, the wolf shifted himself, though not far enough to dislodge Dragon from where he lay against him, still wrapped in a loose embrace.

[Dragon]

Greys small comment made him chuckle slightly, and for the first time in quite a few days he felt some of the weight of grief lift from his shoulder. With a small yet note entirely forced smile he settled himself back down after his lover had shifted. "I've never heard them referred to as 'super powers' before..." he replied softly, mulling over the comment. Grey was succeeding in lifting Dragons mood, though it wouldnt chase everything away completely Dragon was slowly allowing his mood to lift. "Nor have i ever seen any 'superheroes' with the abilities that i have..." he continued, unable t stop the slightly amusement he was getting out of the comment.

After a moment of continued thought he settled, closing his eyes once more. With a little of the grief lifted from his heavy heart he found it easier to try and give into sleep, but how long he laid there in his lovers arms he didnt know before the pull of sleep finally started to call him. Snuggling into Grey a little bit more he let himself relax completely, trying to give in. Love you... he muttered within their minds.